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To Tie, in sickness and in health


Yes, it’s the week of the retro hipster here at happyandpretty, so obviously I’m going to feature ties; for whatever reason, every girl needs to know about ties, of all kinds. Lol, no, not for helping some dude; coz otherwise they get boring.

So you have the neck ribbon ties, the bow ties, the sashes, the cravats and finally the regular ties. There are the skinny ties, but you’d only wear them if you were a butler or a bellboy or one of the servitude classes. So don’t wear them unless you are one; it’s cool if you’re way younger and have a part time job at Starbucks or something, but otherwise, don’t wear it, no matter how cool it looks.

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The first one is the catholic school girl’s trademark, the neck ribbon.

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This one has been around since girls started going to school, probably long before that too. And it will continue to go on and one. Just look at it, the classic feminine tie.

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Here’s how to set one.

Tying them onto you is pretty easy, but if you really want to go the proper Mallory girls hack, go online and order the ready to attach ones; they come in multiple bows and varying designs including the extravagant lady cravat.


There is the ruffled cravat, but those are not simple wear, they’re normally attached to the shirt, and they seldom look not out of place when attachable, but if you like it loud, then this is definitely something you’ll want.


Then there’s the men’s bow tie.

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I don’t like them; I don’t see the need to fight for that piece of attire when we’ve got better stuff going for us.  It’s not like I need this one to do the Bifauxnen look. Plus I get the feeling the original bow tie was a steal on the girl ribbon tie.

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Then comes the real stuff, the stuff that really doesn’t belong to them. The formal long tie, when it came about, was almost a gender neutral thing, and it originally started off as a cravat of sorts. If you were rich, or well standing, you got to wear big expensive silks to keep yourself warm, and the neck livery normally was an indicator of your position, in life.

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Anyway, other than the obvious no-no to the skinny tie, no matter who you saw wearing the thing, you can use anything you like. Clip-ons are the oldest shortcut, but you’re welcome to make your own easy-way-out.

And in case you’re not familiar with how to tie one, here’s some help.

Patrick Novotny

He does so many different kinds of ties, and they’re real easy to follow; yes, there are different ways to tie a tie, the look at the end is real different.

Warning: The channel is addiction prone.

Once you start experimenting, you’ll find there are so many options out there, so many things you can try, so many different materials you can use, so many styles, so many ways to oomph the look (link previous article here), you’ll realise you’ve stumbled into my childhood, which will explain why I’m so classy; okay, okay, well, these are all casual basics for most Catholic private school girls, and I hated the rules and regulations and the nuns and the socks and the ribbons everywhere, but, good god, they’re apparently chic now that they’ve become rare. So welcome back to school.

Oh, and, please, for the love of Mary, do not try to tie a tie onto your head, or worse, use a men’s tie to tie a girl’s bow tie, or the Avril look. Please don’t desecrate the legacy.

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